I won’t be showing up in the paper this week because I’m taking a week off to work on a giant writing project. That’s right, I’m taking a vacation from writing to write. (But don’t feel sorry for me because last month I took a vacation to go to Disney World.) I will not, however, be taking a vacation from Glee — so let’s get this started.

:00 – I honestly can’t remember, was last week good Glee or painful, confusing Glee? Oh wait, it’s all coming back to me … Weddings … Painful and confusing. That means, this week will be good, though, right?

:01 — Hmmm, Emma and Sectionals — two things that have been hardly mentioned this season.

:01 — Emma is reminding Schue that there are a lot of talented people in the glee club besides Finn, Rachel and Mercedes on the big notes. You’re right, Emma. I propose an all-Kurt sectional performance. All in favor? Oh, wait. Kurt doesn’t go to this school any more. I hope we get tons of Handsome Boy Modeling School scenes tonight.

:02 — Hooray! Rachel isn’t getting a solo!

:02 — Boo! Sam and Quinn are getting their own number. Yeah, I’m not on the Sam-and-Quinn train. I like Quinn’s character, but I don’t crave the sound of her voice. And Sam? … Meh.

I miss Kurt already. (This gets really good at about 4:50.)

:02 — Finn: “Look, I’m all for pumping up the team, making everyone feel special, but that’s for practice. You don’t take the star quarterback out before the big game.”

:03 — Santana: “That’s right, Yentl. Your sweetheart? He’s been lying to you. Because he and I totally got it on last year.” So I guess that secret’s out.

:03 — Kurt! He’s already a Warbler! (The glee club at the new school.) And they gave him a canary?

:04 — Kurt: “I think we should open with Rio by Duran Duran.” YES. I SECOND THIS MOTION. All in favor?

:05 — Finn and Rachel are discussing the fact that Finn lied about having sex with Santana with school counselor Emma. Emma: “You’re both in glee, why don’t you sing about it? Right? Aren’t there some great songs about betrayal or something? I’m pretty sure there’s some Eagles songs.”

:07 — Brittany is nervous about being featured at sectionals. Artie says he’ll give her his magic comb. “You comb your hair with it and you can’t lose.”

:08 — Commercial break. These Kinect commercials — “You are the controller” — freak my stuff out. How does that work? Does the Xbox X-ray you while you dance around?

:11 — The club needs more members. Schue asks Puck for help: “Glee needs you to be its ambassador.” Puck: “Or I can say I’m badassador.”

:11 — Kurt gets to audition for a solo!

:13: — Schue just lost his temper with Rachel. FOR REALZ. “I’m tired of this, Rachel. You have a terrible attitude, you’re a lousy sport, and it’s not okay anymore!” I second this motion, too.

:14 — Puck gets stuck in a Porta Potty, and the overweight girl that this show usually plays for really mean laughs saves him. Now she’s joining the glee club. This actress (Ashley Fink) was on a show that awesomely portrayed life as an overweight kid — Huge — which ABC Family canceled after one season. She’s one of two characters on Glee that I hate. The other is the nerdy blogger. I feel like those two characters are always the punchlines to the show’s meanest jokes.

:15 — Puck comforting Rachel, offers her his arm. Rachel: “Have you been working out? Your arms seem bigger.” Puck: “It’s the steroids.”

:20 — Tina’s convinced that Mike Chang and Brittany are having an affair. Tina to Artie: “You haven’t noticed her ignoring you lately?” Artie: “Not really, it’s Shark Week.”

:21 — Rachel, helping Kurt pick out a song for his solo: “Do you ever fantasize about your own funeral?” Now she’s going to sing Don’t Cry for Me Argentina. Oh! And Kurt’s singing it, too. He’s killing it. It’s Defying Gravity, Part II. (Rachel is also killing it.)

Hey, this is cool: You can buy either the Kurt or the Rachel solo version on iTunes.

:23 — Bah. Kurt didn’t win the solo. Cute gay Warbler: “Don’t try so hard next time.” The Warblers are a team, not a collection of soloists. Boo. More Kurt solos, please and thanks.

:26 — Emma is wearing an adorable green coat. She’s not going with Schue to sectionals because she’s trying to be a good girlfriend to John Stamos.

:31 — The new fat glee club member won’t go on stage until the increasingly thin Rachel brings her Raisinettes. Because she’s FAT, get it? Shove off, Glee.

:32 — Kurt says he and Finn haven’t spoken since the wedding. Don’t they live together now?

:34 — Hey, cute gay Warbler …

I thought the Warblers weren’t all about the solos. You’re totally hogging “Hey Soul Sister.” And it’s excellent! Can we trade you for Sam?

:41 — The entire glee club is fighting. Brittany and Mike Chang were cheating on Artie and Tina. Rachel is still mad about Santana, even though Finn points out that she was with another guy when it happened. (Remember the Jesse St. James debacle?)

42: — Brittany says she wasn’t cheating. She only confessed to adultery because “I thought it meant being stupid, like being a dolt.” She lost Artie’s magic comb at “motocross practice.” Brittany and Artie might be the sweetest couple on this show. Even though she’s gay.

:43 — Hey, guess what, Sam and Quinn are still on this show, and they’re singing one of the most heinous songs of my youth.

They’re performing this exactly the way Rachel and Finn usually do, walking through the audience toward each other and then running on stage.

:47 — Mike Chang and Brittany are excellent dancers. But I’m rooting for the Warblers.

:53 — It was a tie. New Directions and the Warblers. Hmm. Aniticlimax.

:53 — Yikes. Emma married John Stamos in Vegas. Congratulations, Aunt Jesse!

:55 — Rachel just told Finn that she made out with Puck to get back at him. So Finn broke up with her. It was very sad. This is the week to talk to Rachel like she’s an unethical moron: “What you did was really bad, Rachel, and you knew how sensitive I’d be about this after what happened to Quinn.”

1:00 — Tina and Mercedes lead the gang on the Florence and the Machine song Dog Days, which I love.

You know what? I really liked this episode. Good performances, good character progress. Lots of Kurt. And everything made all kinds of sense. Let’s celebrate: